Why No One Talks About Friends With Benefits Anymore

Friends with benefits – is it the answer that everyone has been searching for? Couple-up friends are interrogated for the truth…

Exactly what the title says really – what’s up with that? I remember five years ago when my friends and I were first indulging in the so called friends with benefits situations, it was the biggest craze. Now everyone is settling down, getting married and having babies… Am I too young to still be having mind-blowing sex with complete strangers? Or is society just not grown-up enough to deal with it?

I decided to ask a few of my married and coupled-up friends what their views were on the situation, and to be honest, I wasn’t all that surprised by what I found out.

My friend Janet lives in downtown Port Elizabeth and has been married to James for about five years I guess. They are happily married, and they have just had their first child – a baby girl. They both have good jobs and enjoy luxurious vacations. I used to wonder from time to time if I was missing out on something by not having what they were having. Luckily I’m friends with them enough for them to spill their guts out to me! 😉

Janet said that she recently indulged in extra-curricular activity with the gardener they had hired to sort out the backyard after a long, bitter winter. Neither of the two had time to do it so they called a guy, and what a guy turned up! He was hot – every part the gardener fantasy you would imagine. She hit on him, he gave in and eventually, they were screwing in the couch just twenty minutes before James was due to come home. It was exciting, a fantasy she had always had, and possibly one of the most exhilarating experiences she had ever had.

Both of them knew that the relationship would never go any further than casual sex, and when the job was done, they said their goodbye’s without so much as a second thought. Janet got the confidence boost she had needed after the baby had been born, and some of her needs, as well as her garden, got the sorting out it needed.

James regularly travelled for work, and in fact, we even travelled together on a few trips. We’ve slept together a handful of times, and this happened when we were talking about my sexual preferences, and he admitted that he often did the same – used sex date websites to get the sexual gratification Janet hadn’t been giving him since the baby had come along.

Neither of the two were any the wiser as to what the other was doing, and they both got something out of it that they felt was missing. They had both indulged in a little friends with benefits action, and everyone was a great deal happier because of it.

It’s funny because most of my couple-up friends had similar stories to tell when I asked them of their sexual exploits. The majority of them had at least once indulged in an infidelity, and their relationships were flowing along quite nicely.

Could it be that friends with benefits is actually the answer to a long and happy marriage or relationship?

Maybe we should just cut the crap and get on with it, just as I am? Wouldn’t the world be a much happier place if sex dating was considered the “norm”?

Shocking Ways NSA Sex Will Make You Better In Bed

Although taboo, NSA sex has a funny way of making you a better lover in bed. Why not find out the shocking ways how…?

Everyone thinks that NSA sex is a mindless activity – the act of two people coming together and just meeting up for sex and nothing else. There’s something pretty primal about the act, it must be said, but that’s not the be-all and end-all of the situation. Believe it or not, NSA sex CAN and WILL make you BETTER in bed!

Take Kate and Robert, for example. Kate is a student living at the University of Cape Town, and Robert is too. Kate had a pretty steady boyfriend that she’d been dating for a couple of years, but she wondered if she was missing out on something by not having as many sexual experiences as her partner. He had slept with over ten women, and she had only ever slept with him.

They broke it off for a summer to see if their relationship was “meant to be”, and Kate took no time at all in signing up to an NSA dating website in South Africa, and letting her hair down.

She met up with James and had been casually dating him for a couple of months. She had never given her boyfriend successful oral sex, and she wanted to learn how to do it. James happily let her practice away, giving her help and advice where appropriate, and she gradually became a lot better at it.

The moral of this story is that although Kate and Robert got back together, got married, and are currently expecting their first child, she learned a lot in that summer they had broken up. She learned a lot about herself and the way she liked to be touched, as well as learning a lot about what men like. After all, how can you know what to expect if you’ve only ever done it the same way, with the same person?

Of course, this is not something that would work for every couple, and I personally know of at least three couples that have broken down entirely trying the same approach. However, in some situations NSA sex CAN and WILL make you BETTER in bed.

Some people try their hand at casual dating for more sexual experience. Some use it because they don’t really fancy a proper long-term relationship. Some don’t have the time for a full-term relationship. It doesn’t matter the reason behind it, there is always a chance to learn and grow as long as you are openminded about things.

You can learn a lot about “different” sex. For example, during that summer they spent apart, Kate dated a guy called Aidan, who liked to tie her up and play with her body, driving her to distraction. This is something that she subtly hinted to Robert when they got back together, and in the end, they found something they both loved, that actually managed to boost their relationship, both in the bedroom, and out of it. She learnt to trust him a lot more, letting him tie her up and having his wicked way with her, and he learned new ways to pleasure her, bringing home the fact that he was still the best lover she had ever had. They grew together and as they grew, they learned.

7 Ways Sex Is Completely Overrated

Sex – it’s a lot of work and many people don’t even enjoy it that much. Taking a closer look & here’s seven ways that we’ve shown sex is completely overrated.

Sex… It’s a topic of conversation that is bound to divide opinion. We’re sleeping around too much or we’re not getting it enough. We’re worried about whether we are doing it right, or whether the other person is actually enjoying it. Should we wear this? Should we try that? Are we really meant to stick that in there?!

Sex brings with it a thousand and one thoughts, and will create arguments between otherwise rational people. There is no denying that the physical act of sex itself is pleasurable. Most of us probably wouldn’t even bother doing it if it wasn’t. But sex… is it completely overrated?

Let’s bear in mind that most relationships will start with the couple enjoying bountiful amounts of sex. They’ll be at it like bunnies in those first throes of romance, bonking at every possible opportunity, and spreading their wild seeds all over Algoa Park, but when it comes to happily settling down in New Brighton, with a dog, three kids and a mortgage to mountain, sex goes out the window. Could this be that in the grand scheme of things, sex IS overrated? And that there are so many more important things in life to worry about than the act of sex alone?

Sex is overrated because it’s a lot of hassle. There’s the shaving of the legs, or the hair-removal of the *cough* testicles. Come on guys – admit it. You’ve all done it. You primp and preen for a night of passion, but in reality, you get a drunken fumble in the back of the taxi, heading home from that hip Port Elizabeth bar you happened to find them in.

Sex is overrated because we rarely get it right. Let’s be honest about this shall we, most of us have faked it at one point or another with a partner… Whether we are male or female, we must all hold our hands up and say that we’ve done it at least the month. We rarely get it right and you know what; it’s okay. Our bodies aren’t machines. They are designed to be played like a piano. They don’t work in predictable ways. Therefore sex won’t be as you predicted. You might climax too soon, or not climax at all. Things go wrong.

Sex is overrated because it’s a lot of work. Come on guys – think about the hard work you need to put in when you are happily pounding away at your woman. After a while your knees start to hurt, and your muscles in your arms start to give way. The same goes the other way with the girls – your abs are killing because you’ve spent your entire time sucking your own stomach in. It’s not a lot of fun after a while, and it sure is a lot of hard work. Just think of the calories you are burning off! 😉

Sex is overrated because you have to start doing new things to enjoy the “sparkle”. You read it everywhere don’t you – spice up your sex life. Wear naughty lingerie. Buy sex toys. Start using scenarios like two strangers in a bar. Putting things up your… You get the idea, right? Using your imagination that much just feels like a lot of work sometimes.

Sex is overrated because there are so many other important things in life. I guess that’s enough said really… We all know how that one feels.

Sex is overrated because there are so many other ways to indulge in that intimacy. Sometimes a well-timed cuddle will do.

Sex is overrated because it really isn’t that important. There are many happy couples out there that have been together for years and years and years, and haven’t had sex for many of them. Maybe, just maybe, if you took the stress and hassle of sex out of the equation, life would be a lot simpler… and perhaps much more relaxed too.

I certainly wouldn’t turn it down though! 😉